KACHOW: Visionary Elon Musk Reveals New Tesla Roadster That Will Burst Into Flames Faster Than Any Previous Model!!!

Proving the TECHNOPHOBIC NAYSAYERS WRONG once again, Tesla CEO and BASED ALPHA MALE Elon Musk unveiled the long-awaited NEW Tesla Roadster, which cannot just FLY, but is promised to BURST INTO A FIERY INFERNO faster than any previous electric vehicle...

ART OF THE DEAL: Genius President Trump Buys Russia's Entire Reserves Of Siberian Pneumonic Plague To Own The Hygienic Left!!

URGENT WARNING: Radical Zohran Mamdani Declares He Will Forcibly Read The Communist Manifesto To All New Yorkers Before Bedtime?!

SCOTS GONE WOKE: Nessie Puts ‘She/Her’ Pronouns On Loch Ness Sign!!!

I'M LOVIN' IT: Generous President Trump Donates 33 Cents To Charity By Accepting To Round Up His McDonald's Order On The Self-Serve Kiosk!!!

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Yes Definitely maybe Happiness is a hoax invented by Big Happy I do not feel human emotions What? Huh? You're not my real dad! I do not consent to cookies